Why We Do What We Do
Have you ever thought about why you're doing something? What motivates you to take an action, react a certain way or make a specific decision? Often, I believe it ends up being a default reaction...we do what we've always done or what we think we should do. How often do you really consider why?
Have you ever experienced any of these situations or something like them?
Maybe you landed in a specific job type because that's what people in your family do...you can be a doctor, lawyer, or teacher. So what if you love thinking about the experiences a customer has? Or you love the idea of being an electrician? Or you want to be a novelist?
Maybe you signed up to run a race because everyone else is doing it, and you go along with it so you don't stand out.
Maybe you agree to go on the terrifying roller coaster ride rather than admit to your colleagues that you hate rides that make you hang upside down.
Maybe you drive the same way to the mall (when was the last time you went there?) even though Waze may tell you there's a better way.
Maybe you stay up later than is good for a reasonable night sleep constantly checking if a new email is coming in, worried what if you miss something.
These are situations where you may be making a conscious choice but is it the choice you really want to make so that you're living your best life? Are you sleep walking through life? Are you letting others' priorities take over yours? Are you afraid to rock the boat and do what you really want to do?
The saying is "life is short" but we actually really don't know if we're the ones that will die young or live until we're 104. Either way, we owe it to ourselves to be conscious about how we're living our lives. I know there are crisis times where you will just be going through the motions, but, outside of those, we need to be active in living our lives. We need to want to own our choices. We need to make conscious decisions. We need to worry less about what others will think of our choices. We need to do what is right for us at the time. I shouldn't have to say this, but I will...and that isn't done to harm someone else or minimize their value.
I've spent the week posting on the topic of my answer to why I do some of the things I do. My answers were:
Because I can and want to
Because I want a challenge
Because it's fun
Because it's good for me
Notice that I didn't highlight because "I should." How often is your rationale for doing something because you should or you need to? How often is it classified as a "want to?" I think we need to take back the power of what our to-do lists do to us. Many of us love being able to mark things off the list so we put everything possible on it (maybe even after it's already completed:)). How many of you actually spend the time to prioritize the list...which ones are most important to your goals for that day/week/month and why? Which ones will have the greatest impact vs. just something that should/need to get done. If you've never thought about separating your lists, I encourage you to play with this idea. You can download a template for fun here: My Want To Do List. There will always be things we need to do, but hopefully, they also fall into the "want to do" list - I need to buy food for the household because I want us to have healthy choices; I need to call the AC company because I want to have cool air on a 90 degree day. I need to get my car oil changed because I want my car to run effectively and not need repairs. See the difference in this way of thinking about your "need to do" list?
Why you do the things you do may be influenced by how you were brought up, your habits, your current life circumstances, or just your expectations of yourself. However, it's worth checking in...am I going through the motions? Do I know why I'm going down this path, and is it what I want? Why am I doing these things I really don't enjoy?
It's hard to believe that the year is almost over (though I'm hoping 2021 is a bit different), but it's a good time to assess how you want to finish the year out and make some conscious decisions.
Take a breath and assess. Why am I doing what I'm doing right now?